There is a serious lack of blogs about raising two kids who are 8 months apart. I know, I know, my family make-up is somewhat rare but still, someone should be documenting this amazing time. At least that's what I said to myself during my pregnancy... and again when my son was born in mid-Feb... and yet again when he hit the one month mark! The truth is, there is a very good reason that there are so few blogs about two babies under one year old. Who has the time!?
I now have a 9-month old (almost 10 months now, but lets not make a mommy cry just now, ok?) and a 7-week old. My older baby LOVES screen time- phones, tablets, computers- she has mastered touch screens (which occasionally are apparently lick-screens), so when I use an electronic device, I have to keep it hidden from her. I have texted with my mom behind the couch pillow, yes. This obsession of hers makes blogging very difficult. Additionally, much of my day is generally spent in this way: diaper, bottle, diaper, bottle, bottle, diaper, bottle, bottle, bottle. Sprinkled liberally with crying babies. But right now, in an amazing twist, BOTH babies are still asleep!
A family friend recently found out she was pregnant as she was in the process of adopting a second child. It got me thinking again about how difficult it was to find kindred spirits for me & the blogs/message boards I did find were all from many years ago. So, I wanted to at least get general thoughts about the birth soon after adoption out there before the babies start waking up. I hope to delve further into this stuff in future posts, but let's be honest, it may be a couple months before that happens.
For me, the pregnancy & birth were very emotional and sometimes difficult as I couldn't help but think of my daughter's biomom as I felt the baby move, etc. I had a lot of tears for her biomom particularly in the days around the birth. I also had some unexpected feelings after the baby was born (i.e. twinges of weird defensiveness for my daughter when people talked about who my son looked like). It was also difficult for us because people assumed we were told we couldn't have kids and that we had gone through treatments and such before deciding to adopt, which was not the case. It is difficult and awkward to correct people who we hear talking about our miracle baby that we never thought we could have, when in fact we chose adoption on purpose. It is equally awkward (internally, anyway) to just let them tell the story and not correct them.
I think if my daughter was older at adoption, it would be a whole different set of emotional sticking points, and probably there would be time to take some of them on before the new baby (and without being pregnant & emotional already!), so hopefully some of it is easier for most people.
The best part though is the rush of relief & light heartedness as time goes on and you realize there is no paperwork nor social worker visits! This is particularly important since having two babies (and two dogs) means the house is a disaster at all times.
Oh, and now i hear crying, so I must cut this off. Until next time!
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